I've always been attracted to aggressive, raw, emotional music. Sure I love the catchy pop song too but give me something with some feeling to it and I'm all in...doesn't matter the genre.
In 1998 DMX dropped his debut album, "It's Dark and Hell is Hot" and I was introduced to something that I've never heard before. I mean...sure I've listened to hip hop/rap before but DMX added a level of aggressiveness and pain that wasn't there before. Maybe it was the way X sounded. Nobody had that gravelly voice. It stood out.
Then you listened to the words, DMX showed us his soul. The good, the bad, the ugly. All of his flaws were on display. Again, while everybody was bragging about how many cars they had, X did prayers. Seriously? Who else did that? Nobody.
X, also in 1998 dropped his second album, "Flesh of My Flesh, Blood of My Blood". The track on that album that still to this day, and not because of his recent passing, runs through my head is "Slippin." DMX lays out his life story. The struggles, the ups, and downs. The tragedies and the triumphs. Whenever my mind isn't right, which has been a lot recently, I listen to "Slippin". "Ay yo I'm slippin' I'm fallin' I gots to get up, Get me back on my feet so I can tear shit up." We all fall down, it's how we get back up.
Why did I find myself listening to DMX? I'm a skinny, short white dude. Here's what happened. Back in 1998, my parents took my brother and me and moved us to the burbs. My parents didn't want us to attend a bad public school system, so by their logic, moving us to a better school district we'd be better off. So when I started high school I didn't know anybody. I'm was the weird kid from the city. I grew up in the West Park area. So when X dropped It's Dark and Hell Is Hot and Flesh of My Flesh, Blood of My Blood, a young kid who couldn't process emotions heard albums where a man was struggling. That is where I connected with X. Sure, his struggle was different than mine. But I felt his pain and his rawness, his realness helped a young Tony through some shit.
DMX's life, the highs, and lows was a life lived in front of us. We all saw a man struggle with drug addiction, fame, money, family. This isn't the way any fan of DMX's wanted his story to end but we don't always get what we want. I hope and pray that X has finally found peace.
